Question

I am under conviction that I am living wrongly (in sin) because my husband of 10 years was divorced when we married.  This did not concern me when we married but now that I am a Christian it concerns me greatly.  I don' t know what to do about the situation.

Answer

Yes, it is true that if a person marries a divorced person, who was divorced for the wrong reasons (not because of his spouse's adultery, or because the departure of an unbelieving spouse), it is adultery.  Now if your husband was a Christian and was divorced for other than those two reasons, then yes he committed adultery by divorcing and remarrying.  Likewise, if he was not a Christian and divorced for other than his wife committing adultery then again adultery results with his second marriage.

In your case, if he was guilty of adultery by his divorce and remarriage, then you too become an adulteress by marrying him.  However, you stated that you were not a Christian at the time, and then became one.  It was then, that all your sins were forgiven, past, present, and future.  So your sin of adultery was ended and forgiven.  And now that you clearly see it existed, you can plainly tell the Lord that you are sorry for the sin and that you rejoice in His forgiveness to you.

What should you now do about the situation?  It is very simple.  You don't have to do a thing!  Stay married.  When a person gets a divorce, for non-biblical reasons and remarries, then that second marriage is valid, and it would be a sin to divorce your new spouse. Yes there was sin in the divorce and remarriage and it needs to be confessed, but the new marriage is valid, and God never wants that person to divorce the second spouse and return to the first (or single hood) for that would be another sin of divorce.

You are to stay married to your husband and rejoice in God forgiveness and restoration.  Now your husband, if he is not a Christian, then that sin of divorce and remarriage (if non-biblical) still leaves him living in adultery until he becomes a Christian.  Confession of sin as an unbeliever doesn't work, unless it is part of becoming saved.  If he was a believer when first divorced, then he needs to confess the sin.  If he became a Christian later then he is in the same situation as you--forgiven.

Added to Bible Bulletin Board's "Tony Capoccia's Questions and Answers" by:

Tony Capoccia
Bible Bulletin Board
Box 314
Columbus, New Jersey, USA, 08022
Websites: www.biblebb.com and www.gospelgems.com
Email: tony@biblebb.com
Online since 1986