Gleanings from the Inner Life of Ruth Bryan
"Your eyes shall see the King in His beauty."—Isaiah 33:17
DIARY
1822. Early religious impressions—Mourning over a hard heart—Halting between two opinions—Illness of her father
1823. Prayer for sanctified affliction—Father's death
1829. Self-acquaintance—Commencement of spiritual warfare—Earnest longings after a living faith—Hope springing up
1830. First Lord's Table—Doubts and uncertainty—Waiting for a sense of pardon—Becomes a Sunday-school teacher
1831. Anxiety about family prayer—Self-mortification hard to bear
1832. Begins the year with an Ebenezer—Visit to Normanton—Cholera at Nottingham
1833. Declining health—Much spiritual darkness and trying Providences—Last illness and death of her uncle
1834. Journey to Birmingham—Looking into self—Consequent depression—Glimpses of the grace of Jesus
1835. Bearing the cross—Deep heart-exercise—Temptation to infidelity
1836. Fervent wrestlings—Distinction between root and fruit
1837. The Scriptures precious—Helps by the way—Lukewarmness lamented
1838. A profitable conversation—After perplexities—A blessed "assurance of faith" given—Sin a burden—Rejoicing—Symptoms of a fatal disease—The world a snare—Felt helplessness
1839. A close walk with God—Bodily weakness—Fresh manifestations and love visits from Jesus—Foretasting glory—Deep sense of sin—The Savior her hiding-place—Living in Christ—The flesh subdued—Fasting and feasting
1840. Renewed dedication of body, soul, and spirit to the Lord—Remembrance of past mercies—Shortcoming—Searchings of heart—Victory through the blood of the Cross
1841. Soul discipline—Diving teaching—Under a cloud—Felt distance from her Lord—Pressing after a life of faith—Restored to communion—Much tried respecting the publication of her letters
1842. Large requests—Perfect freedom—The Proverbs of Solomon full of Christ—Groaning under felt corruptions, yet glorying in the Lord—Financial straits
1843. Earnests of the inheritance—Her watchword, "More of Christ"—His Person unfolded by the Spirit, through the Word—Sorrow and joy—Self-loathing—The fight of faith—The chastening of love—Kissing the rod—Spiritual arithmetic
1844. Risen with Christ—Blessed views, by faith, of a glorious Christ—Feeding upon the Word—Poor and needy—Leaning upon the Beloved—Jesus her daily Sabbath—Still panting after further revelations of His glory
1845. Eternal union with Jesus—Fiery darts of the wicked one—The Precious name of Jesus—Lesson from a spider's web—Temporal mercies lent by the Lord—Fresh anointings from the Holy One—Singing of mercy and judgment
1846. The illness of her mother—Anxieties and pleadings on her behalf—New discoveries of the beauty of Jesus—Serving Him without fear—Grace abounding—Her mother's death—A sparrow alone—The Lord also her Comforter
1847. Not alone—Visit to the grave—Communion with glorified saints—Pressing cares—Walks by faith—Timely deliverance—Visits the House of Refuge
1848. Peculiar straits—Looking unto Jesus—Longing for the salvation of souls—A cry from the depths—Feasting at the King's table—The triumph of faith—Prayer and fasting, with thanksgiving—A great answer—Emboldened to wait upon the Lord—Singing His praise
1849. The Lord's faithfulness—Temporal and spiritual help bestowed—A visit to Ockbrook—Great weakness of body—Beams of the coming glory—Rejoicing in the great salvation—Laboring in the vineyard—A public fast—Continued trial in temporal matters, yet cleaving to the Lord and to His promises
1850. Christ her all in all—Favored with access to the throne of grace—Blessed fellowship with Jesus—Matlock blessings—Teachings of the Spirit—The spread of Popery
1851. A day of darkness—A "time of refreshing" from the presence of the Lord—Fatigue and sharp conflict—Great Malvern—Journeying mercies—Increasing sufferings, but new songs—A happy Christmas Day
1852. Rumor of a French invasion—Trusting in the Lord—Heart-wanderings—A peculiar trial—Meditations on the Word—A day of humiliation—Friday evening meetings—Prayer to know God's will in little things
1853. Seeking brighter evidences—Sensible comforts diminished—Faint, yet pursuing—Sojourn in Edinburgh—Feasting in Famine
1854. Yearning over the soul of a sick friend—Good Friday a hallowed season—The mystery of the blessed Trinity unfolded—Lessons from the Scriptures—Thanksgiving for a plentiful harvest—A time of war—Fellowship with Christ in His sufferings
1855. Thoughts upon death—A day of national fast and humiliation—Much exercised about seeking further medical advice—Passion week—A time of Jubilee—Sips from the fountain—A glorious view of a suffering Christ—Resurrection blessedness—Justification by faith—Christmas-eve
1856. A time of temptation—The Bible a wonderful book—Perplexing letters spread before the King—National rejoicings on account of peace restored—The blessings of Calvary—Martha and Mary—A visit to Filey—Self-examination—"The Word made flesh"
1857. The Spirit's word—Redemption price—Pantings after Jesus—A banquet with the King—The coverings of the tabernacle—A second visit to Filey—Divine love—Watching for the Lord's hand on the top of Mount Carmel
1858. A New Year's motto: "Looking unto Jesus"—The Refiner's work—Longing for the "better land"—The debt paid, and the Church eternally free—The blessedness of union—No birthday portion—The sun in a mist—The furnace
1859. Tribulation—Disease progressing—Death of Mr. T—. Preciousness of the blood of the Lamb—Jesus as the High Priest—Christ delighting in His Church—A feast-day
1860. Much bodily suffering—The enemy harassing—Christ in the types, Psalms, and Prophets—The realization of the presence of Jesus in the furnace—Safe in the Ark—The Lord Almighty for a crown of glory—The last entry
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